Suffice to say, I'm going to look into going back into regular therapy in the near future. I still think I'd fix a lot of things I perceive as broken in my life (weight, confidence, insomnia, anxiety, depression to name a few) with regular vigorous exercise and a better diet.
There's been an outbreak of Name That Tune on my friendslist, so I posted some lyrics to namethattune. Feel free to jump in.
I feel right now like I'm trying to fill in the blank in this sentence: "My life would be great right now if only _________." I had perspective? Appreciation (of my circumstances, not other people appreciating me)? Closer friends/friends closer (I really need to cultivate my network here; most of the friends I have I know of through riding and it's been too cold/icy for much of that)? I know my life is pretty close to perfect, but I feel like I'm missing something. Not a vague malaise or the basic fact that life is never perfect. I feel like there's a genuine lack, a hole, something (almost) tangible missing.
I'm going to put together a list of things I need/want/would like, and then start pruning. The 3-5 items that stay I will break down into discrete tasks I can attack. There's got to be a better way.