The Enemy of the Good (eideteker) wrote,
The Enemy of the Good

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Wow almost emotional breakdown tonight. Dealing suicide coping not the memories. Tears they flow, the cheeks bathed or not, I withhold. I withdraw. Too close to the reality of being again the mind's pure thoughts to page flow though not a humor of ship captainry. Would that I'd feel could I be truly sad not disturbed the release of inner emotion a man who could cry would be stronger not the weak.To lose the friend to lose composure to loose the floodgates a tide of me drowning unable to handle every man's burden.

Why the fuck can't I cry?!! I wanted to tonight. I rilly did. When someone mentions being suicidal, and you remember how maybe, just maybe you once saved someone's life, you should FUCKING CRY dammit! It's not fair. It's not fucking fair.

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