The Enemy of the Good (eideteker) wrote,
The Enemy of the Good
eideteker

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Siouxsie!

One thing I realized is that this is the first time that my father hasn't criticised my appearance (still-painted toenails aside). He actually said I looked good, which must mean that I actually do.

So I don't have very far to go. But then, where am I going? I get the sense from watching High Fidelity (again last night, yay) that girls like Laura (who are basically pretty cool, unlike Sarah, who was needy, or Charlie, who was vapid) want a man who is going somewhere. It's not that he has to take her with him; it's not like some carry-on luggage thing. Some girls actually want to see you make yourself happy, and not because they value their worth on it. I would think all this was obvious, except you see so little of it in practice.

I've been spinning my wheels a bit lately, not really going anywhere. So I want to be a writer. What am I doing about it? Watching lots of movies and reading lots of books and writing in little tiny baby steps, but also not a hell of a lot. Not learning by doing; I should probably be working on a novellette by this point. What good is a sabbatical if you don't use it?

Sometimes, people complain I haven't been on AIM (it's rare, but happens), but I think it's not true. I think I spend too much time on AIM. Alison is right about one thing: self-control is America's biggest problem. And my life used to be devoted to it. So maybe I will limit myself to very specific times, or maybe I will cut myself off entirely. TV, AIM, LJ. Maybe I need a bit more monastic existence, but I have a feeling that sitting around the house with nothing to do but read will inspire me to get out a bit more. Some of it driving, but gas prices would seem to dictate that I'll have to spend part of the time exploring on foot. Maybe I should find a different natural park each Sunday to drive to. And on the weekends I have Saturdays off, maybe I can find them nearer to Becca.

I can also finally start plugging away at this list. The nearest Aikido place listed on the website (other than the one in Brooklyn, which is ehh, in Brooklyn) is 40 minutes away. Given my revolving schedule at work, I'm not sure I can make the committment. But I should still look into it, instead of wussing out by default.

VH-1 Classic's "Who Weekend" this weekend will be a great help in getting me the FUCK AWAY from the TV.

Ooh, Billie Jean. I still have to design the pressure-sensitive light-up dance floor that I will dance on at my wedding reception. Definite goals, action, and self-improvement. Without it, life would just be stagnation, and independent life would just be lonely stagnation.

I ought to start by doing a load of laundry, since the laundromat is right next to the garage where my mechanic is going to take a look at my mirror some time after three-thirty. Didn't I just do laundry? Yes, but I have some towels and stuff I'd like to wash for summer. I don't have to, but that's the whole idea! Being proactive!
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