A very nice lady came into the bank today. I recognized her from last week, when she'd opened and account with us. It was thankfully slow for the only time that day since 10AM or so, and she needed to endorse and ennumerate all her checks, so we had some time to chit-chat. She was fairly pretty, with strawberry blonde hair, kind of like my dear friend Alison's. She was very intelligent (a Ph.D), and well-spoken, etc. She started reminding me a lot of Alison. Many little things, like her immediate trust of me, her similar medical condition, and her nervous energy. She was very nervous, but also very capable. She was also just the same shade of adorable. Fortysomething, yes, but still almost adorable. There's either two ways I can see people once my eyes penetrate their skin; I can be completely repulsed and detest them, or I can see a certain childlike earnestness in them that just simply causes me to adore them. So yes, I fall in love a lot, with odd people at even odder angles. Some people I just feel like I'd like to do anything to make them feel better; happier. I like to think that there are certain of you for whom I'd give my life.
Mostly what I realized from looking at this reflection of my friend from 20 years hence is that I miss her. It's been at least a week since we talked, other than when she IM'ed me to say happy Thanksgiving and I was out of the room. I'm in definite withdrawal. One good thing, though: since I can't run to the same person, I'm talking to the rest of my friends a lot more, which is something I neglect to do. I've just gotten comfortable; in a groove.
Agree or don't; sometimes the words just come together and I remember that I am intelligent.
"Once in awhile, you'd be better listenin to fools for a change."