The Enemy of the Good (eideteker) wrote,
The Enemy of the Good
eideteker

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IN THE BEGINNING

There was the pimp.

These are the commands he backhanded down to his h0s, for them to follow always.

Ladies and Johns, I give you

The Ten H0mmandments

1. I AM THE PIMP, thy pimp. Thou shalt have no pimps asides me.

2. THOU SHALT NOT take my name in vain; nor talk shit bout me behine my back— Silky will hear bout dat shit, b'lieve me.

3. KEEP ALWAYS thy evenins free. Thy days, too, but especially night time. Remember— you belon ta Silky.

4. HONOR THY PIMP as if he were thy father. You never know— he jes might be!

5. THOU SHALT NOT steal from thy pimp, nor cut his product. Refer thine ass to #2: Silky will know.

6. THOU SHALT NOT give it away fo free, save to thy pimp.

7. THOU SHALT NOT KILL. Keep thy mind on h0in'. If a John git outta line, Silky gots trained professionals who kin regulate they ass in a clean, orderly fashion. Last thing Silky need to be found accessory to some sloppy-ass, h0-perpetrated killin.

8. THOU SHALT NOT LIE to thy pimp. Or ain't you learned yet that Silky always know?

9. I AM THE PIMP, yo sheperd. There ain't nothin y'all shall want. Simply axe Silky, and it shall be done. That is, of course, unless you need to spend less time pullin tricks (see #2, 5, & 8) and more time turnin 'em. Silky take care a his h0s, but he don't reward no indolence.

10. THOU SHALT NOT COVET shit what otha h0s got. Silky don't play favrites, an if he do, it ain't nonna yo dam bizness.
Now if you wanna covet anotha h0's ass, y'all two can do it on top a Silky. Dis go wit #6.

Let us not forget the final h0mmand that supercedes all and underlies them: You best REKANIZE.

"I know I'm headed for the bottom... but I'm riding you all the way."
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