April 22nd, 2004


American Tragedy

In my readings, I came across an article on /. that seemed out of place. As I read within, I found there was a "new" style of yo-yoing out there called "freehand". I've been desperate to try it out since. I ran hither and thither looking for a store that sells Duncan yo-yos, but it was to Noah Vale. I found a grand total of four butterfly yo-yos in K-Mart after checking Toys 'R Us, Target, KB toys (it used to be toy and hobby) and the biggest frickin mall in the state (and an even bigger one in NY). I was shocked, amazed, and finally appalled to find that almost no one carries yo-yos anymore. I lamented all the more the death of my Yomega "yoyo with a brain" a few years back. It is with a heavy heart (and a lightened wallet) that I go to make my purchase from Duncan's website without actually seeing or trying out the yo-yo that I am buying. I have selected a "throw monkey" which is supposed to be the current New Hotness. Supposedly, you can use it the same way you use a classic yo-yo (so I will not be entirely lost), plus the world of freehand tricks is open to you. I wanted a yo-yo with a six-sided die as the counterweight, but supposedly the superball is better (you can do bounce tricks!) if not as cool looking. And, since I was just thinking I needed a lunch box, I have thrown the lunch box kit into the mix. I no longer walk home for lunch, so I have started bringing my lunch. Now I have something to carry it in that says: "Wow, I have no fucking clue what is cool and what is just totally not workplace appropriate."

I am at once an old soul and entirely kidlike. I am a ninety-year old crotchety man juggling dentures for laughs. What the hell.
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