January 15th, 2002

I'm glowing.

I've had a few people tell me that I'm their best friend lately. That's so amazing. I don't view the best in "best friends" as a comparative superlative. It's a superlative, for sure; you're a superlative friend. But you can have more than one "best" friend. Or you can at least be best friend to more than one person. It's a level of closeness, trust, and honesty. "Gee, I really don't like my toes." That's the kind of thing you can only tell a best friend without expecting them to be disinterested.

I view it as an honor. I really do. I almost cried, twice. I'm almost crying now.

I want more best friends. I want to know more people. I want to find the people who will talk to me about toes and cloud shapes and the sound of breaking glass as used in YYZ.

I'm now a verified member of paypal, with no sending limit. That's kind of like being a best friend. "We trust you a lot, and you trust us." Except there's love between friends. I love.

I want to share hugs with someone, though. With no talk of perfect and parents and committments and distance. I want to lay in the grass and blow bubbles, toes curling into the spongy earth. And I want someone to try to catch those bubbles. Not to try to catch me.

"You sometimes drive me crazy, but I worry about you."