I've re-discovered pop-up video, and apparently, this tune was originally supposed to be about a relationship with an abusive woman.
I think it would have been my favorite song.
(of course would it have gotten any airplay and blah blah blah I would've never heard it but still)
Straining like a plaid chameleon
Spinning like a planet headed for aphelion
I never know just when I'll be coming back
Maybe this time the rubber band will snap
An electric socket poked with a fork
I feel the universe's deadly torque
(Peter Tork Peter Tork)
And the Swedish chef goes "børk børk børk"
A grip more tenuous than any combover
I'm allergic to my four-leaf clover
I gotta rash from handling cash
And Pisa's about to fall over
Do you ever feel like one of those drinking birds?
Except you keep sticking your head into a mound of turds
(wide-eyed cow pied)
You open your mouth at a loss for words
You went to see Winger cause you thought they said Wings
And everything's just one of those Seinfeld things
Aim for the farthest star and swing over the bar
Except you're too big for the swings
Why do I stay when there's nothing left
Except maybe a kick to the gluteal cleft
(Leeza Gibbons sliced to ribbons)
My escape is anything but deft
I think I need to spend less time being intelligent and more time sounding clever.
Since when did I forget how to write well?